Building strong and meaningful connections with coworkers can be challenging. Outside of work, we grow friendships by sharing things that are more personal than professional. Sure, we may talk to our friends about work, but we also feel comfortable sharing more of the intimate details of our lives.
In my storytelling workshop, I bring up the idea of using a personal story and connecting it to an issue at work.
We talk about vulnerability. I define that as the willingness to show that you’re not perfect and haven’t had a perfect life. It’s the willingness to admit “I’m not perfect and it’s okay that you’re not perfect either.”
Many participants have no problem sharing stories that are personal. And sometimes those stories relate to something professional. For example, the time they got fired. The time they made a big mistake at work. The time they changed their college major for the fourth time.
But some folks don’t like the idea of sharing anything personal and here’s why:
They worry about crossing the line between professional and personal.
They may not like some of their coworkers whether they’re a boss, a peer, or a direct report. So why put yourself out there for a person you wouldn’t want in your lifeboat?
Or they may not know some of their coworkers very well and worry if they get personal, it’ll be used against them in the future.
They worry about looking weak or stupid. And if the story gets a bit emotional they think they’ll look super lame.
They worry that revealing any personal info will backfire in some way.
Nevertheless, even the wary participants agree to play along. They find a story from their personal life and connect it to a challenge faced at work.
Some of the folks get more personal than others. Some tell really funny stories about how they messed something up. Some folks get a bit emotional because they tell stories about family members. Or their dog.
At the end of workshop, I poll participants and ask how they felt about the storyteller at the beginning of the day vs. the end of the day. And it’s always, always, always the same.
1. People who didn’t know each other well have new insights into their coworkers.
2. Liking increases.
3. Connection increases.
4. Nobody ever thinks less of those storytellers who got a bit emotional.
5. And overall, they aren't worried that telling their story will affect them negatively at work.
Telling a story that’s based on a personal event fosters connections. These types of stories are essential for creating a collaborative and productive workplace.
Storytelling is a tool. Yes, a tool.
Stories help us bridge gaps by tapping into shared experiences. When coworkers share stories, they reveal more about themselves beyond their professional persona.
When we share our journeys, struggles, and victories we promote empathy and a sense of understanding. These moments of vulnerability make it easier for others to relate to us.
It’s like when you were in middle school and saw your teacher at the grocery store with a crying toddler: “What, they also eat? And they have a baby that isn’t perfect? Mind blown!”
Getting a peek into someone else’s life always makes us more human. And more relatable. Storytelling turns the workplace into a community where individuals are invested not only in the work but in each other.
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