When I run storytelling workshops, I ask participants what tips they’ve heard about being less nervous when public speaking. I ask because many of us would rather get a colonoscopy by a demonic clown than speak in public.
And by speaking in public, I mean speaking to a group. This could mean telling a story to a group of 10 colleagues or doing a PowerPoint presentation in a grand ballroom with 500 attendees.
Two tips come up that nobody seems to think would work: picturing the audience naked or focusing on the wall rather than looking at the audience.
I suppose trying to imagine people naked is an attempt to offset your feelings of vulnerability. But, you won’t feel better by trying to make the audience vulnerable too, aka naked. And it’s a waste of mind space that hijacks your focus.
And talking at a wall is just silly. You’ll come off looking like a sociopath. Or a beefeater.
When I think of naked audiences or focusing on a wall, I think of performers. And for some reason I’m thinking of Celine Dion. Can you imagine her picturing everyone naked? She’d be so disrupted she’d sing “ Near, far, wherever you are, I believe that… you may want to get that growth looked at!”
And the last thing Celine would do is sing to the back wall. Her goal is to connect with her audience emotionally. She knows people are there to feel something. They could’ve stayed home and listened to an album, but instead, they came in person.
Does this mean that Celine doesn’t get nervous before a performance. Of course not.
But she’s doing something we can all do. And that is focus on the audience.
In my workshops I tell people about something called the “inward moment” and the “outward moment.”
You’ve heard about taking a deep breath to calm nerves. But you may look silly standing silently in front of a group, closing your eyes, and taking a big inhale. They may direct you to the yoga class down the hall. Or the acting class.
So instead, the inward moment I’m talking about is a mental thing. You say to yourself, “I am going to let myself be seen.” That may seem obvious, as you’re literally standing in front of a group. But it’s a mind thing - the decision that you’re going to let people into your space, so to speak. You’ve decided not to hide behind a podium. You’re acknowledge that you’re in front of the room and you will be looked at.
The other part is the outward moment. That’s another mind thing where you tell yourself “I’m going to see them.” This may also sound odd as the audience of 10 or 500 is literally in the same room with you (or on the same Zoom). But this is key. When you decide to actually look at the people in front of you, things start to change.
And when I say see them, I don’t just mean see them with your eyes. Rather, you see them as people who have challenges and issues that your talk will address.
Rather than telling a self-serving story or a giving a presentation full of facts you want them to know, you talk about what you think is important to them. In essence, you figured out what they’re feeling, collectively. Then your story speaks to them in a way that demonstrates that you get it.
So yes, you’ll probably be a nervous before you give a talk. Nerves means the talk is important. And assuming you’ve done a good job prepping, turning your focus on the audience will help a lot. It turns public speaking into an act of service rather than a self-conscious performance. It turns public speaking into a means of connecting with your audience on an emotional level.
So before your next public speaking event, ask yourself (1) what are your audience’s challenges and (2) how do you want them to feel when you’re done talking? Just like Marketing 101, what are their pain points? And how will your talk address them?
Thank you for reading! If you liked this article, please share and let me know what you think in the comments.
Learn how to tell great stories at work. Dawn Ziegerer runs The Great Story Workshop where she helps leaders and entrepreneurs create stories with strategic messages that connect, motivate, and engage colleagues.
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